|Season 1, Episode 32|
|The Professor invents a phosphorus dye that may get the Castaways rescued. The Skipper has to lose weight and Gilligan has to gain weight so they can re-join the Navy. Will the castaways be rescued ..or not?|
|Air Date:||May 8, 1965|
|Written By:||Herbert Finn and Alan Dinehart|
|Directed By:||Gary Nelson|
|Diogenes, Won't You Please Go Home?||It's Magic|
Physical Fatness is the 32nd episode of the First Season. It first aired May 8, 1965.
The Professor has found a way to create a phosphorus dye that will glow at night and may get the Castaways rescued. When Gilligan learns this, he runs to tell the Skipper the good news, then changes the subject to what they will do when they're rescued. With the S.S. Minnow out of commission, the Skipper feels he has no recourse but to re-join the U.S. Navy. However, when he checks the Navy Regulations handbook for his required weight, he realizes that he's twenty-two pounds overweight and needs to lose weight. He asks Gilligan to help him lose the weight. One night while Skipper sneaks out for a snack, he finds Gilliganhiding in the food locker. During the day, as Gilligan is working on the raft, Ginger helps the Skipper exercise, and Mrs. Howell gives him a bottle of diet pills. Gilligan then discovers that at 125 pounds he is five pounds underweight to join the Skipper in the Navy. Mary Ann and Ginger are now trying to fatten up Gilligan to help him, which irks the Skipper who has to watch Gilligan eat as he works on the raft. Eventually, the raft gets done, and the Professor leaves his dye near Gilligan to help the Skipper get it into the water. Gilligan unfortunately mistakes the dye for food and starts eating it, and at dusk, the Skipper calls Gilligan to bring the dye. Ginger is first to notice Gilligan's spectral form glowing in the dark as he arrives on the beach with the empty bowl. As punishment, the Skipper sticks Gilligan atop the lookout tower, rotating around and around with a blanket and imitating a signal light.
- "There's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip."
- Gilligan as a searchlight
- Bob Denver as Gilligan
- Alan Hale Jr. as The Skipper
- Jim Backus as Mr. Howell
- Natalie Schafer as Mrs. Howell
- Tina Louise as Ginger
- Dawn Wells as Mary Ann
- Russell Johnson as The Professor
- When the Skipper stands on the scale in the Supply Hut to check his weight, the Professor warns him the Professor's Scale goes only up to 200 pounds. Likewise, Gilligan warns him after he sits on the Fish Scale that the Skipper weighs between a largemouth bass and a hammerhead shark!
- It is unknown as to how old the Skipper's Navy Regulations book is; chances are the regulations might have changed in the interim. It is also likely he could rejoin at the same pay grade he was when he left the Navy.
- When they weigh themselves, the Skipper weighs 221 Pounds, 22 pounds over the Navy limit, and Gilligan weighs 125 pounds, 5 pounds underweight.
- The Skipper shouldn't have to join the Navy after getting rescued as his insurance company would reimburse him the cost of the Minnow, as revealed in Court-Martial and Rescue from Gilligan's Island. Failing that, Mr. Howell would surely buy him a boat.
- When Gilligan is eating and the Skipper is working on the raft, Ginger and Mary Ann can be see far right waiting for their cue to enter the scene.
- In President Gilligan, Gilligan suggests they build a lookout tower; in this episode a tower has been built.
- Arguably, the Professor (and possibly the Castaways) are partly to blame for the botched-up rescue this time as he should have warned Gilligan not to eat the phosphorescent dye.
- Gilligan would likely have experienced serious if not fatal side effects from drinking a phosphorescent dye.
- Skipper - "Do you think that scale will hold me, Gilligan? "
Gilligan - "Come on, Skipper, we've weighed bigger fish than you."
Skipper - "What do it say?"
Gilligan - "Well, Skipper, you're right between a large mouth bass and a hammerhead shark."
- Gilligan - "If you go in the Navy, I'll go in the Navy."
Skipper - "Why, Gilligan, I had no idea that you felt that way."
Gilligan - "Skipper, you're my buddy and my pal and shipmate."
Skipper - "You mean, you'd stick with me?"
Gilligan - "Sure. It's better than starving to death."
- Mary Ann - "Why don't we both feed Gilligan?"
Ginger - "Okay. Good idea. We'll turn the little string bean into a jolly green giant."
- (The Howells notice Skipper and Ginger exercising.)
Mr. Howell - "Oh isn't that lovely? You know they say if you watch the movements, you can tell a whole story."
Mr. Howell - "I don't get what he's saying, but with her, I do get the message."
- Skipper - "Must you feed Gilligan in front of me?"
Ginger - "No, Skipper. We can go someplace else."
Skipper - "No, that's all right. At least I can smell the food. I mean, even though my stomach is unhappy, my nose is happy."
- Mr. Howell - "Gilligan, my boy, I've prepared a dish to titillate even your unsophisticated palate. Behold, the specialty de la maison."
Gilligan - "What is it? It smells like fish stew."
Mr. Howell - "Fish stew? It's a world famous French recipe. Bouillabaisse."
Gilligan - "What does bouillabaisse mean in English?'
Mr. Howell - "Fish stew."
- Mrs. Howell - "If you work, you're liable to perspire. If you perspire, you're liable to lose weight. Isn't that true, Thurston?"
Mr. Howell - "I don't know. I've never perspired."
- Ginger - "You know, I took chemistry when I was in high school. I'll never forget one day when I was in class. I mixed ammonia with some kind of acid, and you know what I got?"
Professor - "Expelled?"
Ginger - "No, I got a date with the most handsome young fireman."
- (The Skipper gets a leaf of lettuce for dinner.)
Skipper - "Gilligan, this isn't enough food for a grown man."
Gilligan - "It's enough food for an overgrown man."
- Professor - "Remember Skipper that scale only goes up to two hundred pounds."
(Gilligan repeats this line to the Skipper on the fish scale.)